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The Remarriage Market

When Hermione was pregnant with Primus, we attended a kind of hippie birth preparation class. It was intentional, because Hermione is pretty big on the whole natural birth thing. Plus, the childbirth industry in the US is a gigantic scam – but that’s a topic for a whole post on its own. We’ve kept up with everybody from that class via Facebook, and for good reason. It was a pretty eclectic mix of people.

There’s one couple from that group in particular that caught our eye. Both were pretty southern. He was a working class Joe (mechanic, if I recall correctly). She was a graduate student at the same major southern university that Hermione and I were enrolled in at the time. On the other hand, he was a pretty alpha guy. He was one of those guys who talked the macho talk pretty well, and we just knew that his daughter was going to have him wrapped around her finger as soon as she was born. Also, the wife was super religious. The pairing seemed a bit odd, but it also seemed to work.

Alas, it was not to be. Before his daughter’s first birthday, his wife had pushed him out the door and was out on the skanky-ho club scene. Now, the club scene doesn’t necessarily have to be the skanky-ho club scene. But we saw the Facebook pictures, and I call it like I see it. Her outfits would be skanky enough on a 20 year old. On a woman in her early thirties with a kid, it’s the kind of thing where you want to just tell her to grow up a bit. If you needed any more proof of everything Dalrock’s been saying for the last year or so about how even the highly religious aren’t immune from the modern divorce culture, this is it.

It’s been a little bit over a year now, and within the last couple of months, both of them have gotten remarried. It’s worth noting that his new wife is significantly hotter than his ex.

Divorce theft sucks for men, no question. But they do much better than women on the remarriage market.

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Categories: Alpha, Society
  1. April 16, 2012 at 10:08 pm

    I liked this post, and I hope it is true, and that there is a rough justice in the world. But he lost his daughter, in a sense, I presume.

    • April 16, 2012 at 10:20 pm

      It is 100% true. Unfortunately, he did pretty much lose his daughter, and that sucks balls.

  2. April 16, 2012 at 10:41 pm

    With a mother like that, he lost the girl before she was born.

  3. katmandutu
    April 17, 2012 at 12:00 am

    “Also, the wife was super religious.”

    That’s highly doubtful in view of what she did to her poor husband. People do not change overnight unless they have undergone some form of mental or physical trauma. My guess, is that her faith was never that strong in the first place, or it had been on the wane for sometime.

    No one is immune from divorce. However if a husband and wife are practicing Christians, and true (REALLY TRUE) believers and take their marriage vows seriously, then the likelihood of divorce is greatly diminished.

    My husband and I have been married for 16 years and hold the same religious values. We take our wedding vows seriously.

    Not once over the years, even in times of trial have I ever thought of divorce.

    Marriage can be hard work. It ain’t all beer and skittles. ;)

    Unfortunately there are a few women around these days who think it should be.

    There are also many women around who purport to be faithful Christians too.. Upon digging a little deeper one often finds this not to be the case. Appearances can be deceiving.

  4. April 17, 2012 at 8:37 am

    Nice post. We did the midwife hippy birth thing too, and what a mix. One young lady had her mom attend the class with her (absent father, assumed unmarried and oops). The future grandmother had a kid that breast fed until nearly 5 years old.

    No doubt kids are hard though, for us husbands/fathers it can be difficult to figure out the new relationship dynamic after the baby is brought in the mix and it’s easy to feel left out. My brother’s ex-wife did the skanky ho thing too before/during and after they initiated divorce proceedings. Sucks to be a man trying to make it work when the wife/mom doesn’t.

  5. April 17, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    katmandu: “That’s highly doubtful in view of what she did to her poor husband”

    You’re equivocating on the meaning of “super-religious”, and that doesn’t help the discourse. Imagine a woman who fellow churchgoers might deem “super-religious”, but who would step out on her husband.

    If you can’t imagine such a person, what do you suppose it is that hypocrites do?

  6. katmandutu
    April 17, 2012 at 7:08 pm

    My problem is deeming any woman “super religious”, Matthew.(devout Catholic” is another one that I have a problem with.) Because it implies (to me amyway) that she is somehow above others with regards to Christian morality. And just because other churchgoers deem her to be “super religious” does not mean that it is the case.

    I see these descriptions used quite a bit around blogs. These sorts of things.

    “She cheated on her husband and she was such a good Christian woman!”

    And this,

    “See, these Christian women are no different to the rest” etc

    When in actual fact, these women are often not what they purport to be. This is why I say appearances can be deceptive. A woman turning up for Church every Sunday and singing in the choir does not necessarily mean she is a religious one. Watching what they say and do, asking their opinions on serious issues, will really tell you if her faith is strong.

    Matthew, I would not even describe myself as a “Devout Catholic” and I would cringe if anyone described me as such.

    I know my failings and my weaknesses. I sin as we all do. I am not worthy to sit at the feet of my Lord. I know this. Deep in my heart I truly KNOW this! I try to do better, but often I stumble.(you can see that for yourself when I get worked up on some of these threads.) I get my strength from God. The more I pray the more strength I get. I have no illusions about myself. I am weak.I know, that if I did not love God and pray that I would soon drift away from him and possibly into serious sin (I have seen this happen with other women) Satan is the great tempter.

    So, I am never smug and complacent. There but for the grace of God go I.

    I just have this problem with describing Christian women as extremely good, when in actual fact they may not be. Why are men not described as super religous? Or similar?

    I am rambling a bit I know,(I am neither as intelligent or articulate as yourself) but there has always seemed to me to be this implication that women are somehow more devout and serious about their faith, than men, which is of course not the case at all!

    I am not trying to be obtuse or wanting to argue about this, it’s just that I think that we should exercise caution when we describe women as “super religious” because I tend to see it as another form of pedestalizing.

    I don’t think that there ARE many super religious women around. I just don’t. Practicing Christian would be a sufficient enough description.

  7. April 18, 2012 at 1:13 am

    katmandu, I’ll read your post in just a minute, but the obvious problem you’re having is failing to consider what other people mean by “super religious”.

    No one is arguing that women accurately described by the meaning which YOU ascribe to the phrase “super religious” will commit the heinous acts under question.

    Read that again. Then consider this:

    * You have an internal representation of the concept “super religious”
    * Your internal representation absolutely precludes adulterous behavior
    * Interlocutor X describes an adulterous woman as being “super religious”

  8. April 18, 2012 at 1:16 am

    katmandu:

    “She cheated on her husband and she was such a good Christian woman!”

    That anyone has ever made that statement should be enough to tell you–nay, to scream at you–that men cannot tell the difference between harlots and good Christian women.

    Is that the fault of men?

  9. katmandutu
    April 18, 2012 at 7:31 am

    “Is that the fault of men”

    This is not about ascribing fault to men .

    It’s about attributing piety and fervour to Christian women who are for the most part undeserving.

    “Super religious’ ? The literal meaning is… extremely pious, conscientious and scrupulous, having a great love and fervour for the divine…

    What other meaning can there be Matthew?

    I am puzzled as to what other meaning may be ascribed to “super religious”.

  10. April 18, 2012 at 7:43 am

    The argument over “super religious” or not is mostly semantics. In the context of the post, what was meant was, “outwardly appearing super religious in all other aspects than the one given.” Since, at the time, she was on her first marriage, there was no way for the casual observer to know that this kind of behavior would manifest. The point is that outward religiosity is of limited utility in determining whether a woman will behave this way or not. Sure, after the fact we can say that she wasn’t really super religious. But before hand, there’s no real basis for making that judgement.

    Outside the terms of this argument, be careful about reading “super religious” to mean “strongly adherent to *RELIGION X*.” One can be Hindu, Muslim, Wiccan, neo-Pagan, or even a true Satanist and still be “super religious,” but the qualities one would have wouldn’t be anything like what you want to ascribe to the term, Katmandutu.

  11. katmandutu
    April 18, 2012 at 8:02 am

    “but the qualities one would have wouldn’t be anything like what you want to ascribe to the term, Katmandutu.”

    I quoted the dictionary meaning of super religious, L. This is not some inward internal representation of my own, here. It’s the literal meaning.

    And, I agree the casual observer cannot possibly know the extent of a woman’s piety, which is why I said that the term super religious should be used with caution.

    I myself said above that outward signs of religiosity such as attending church and singing in the choir for instance are not always indicative of a super religious woman.

  1. April 22, 2012 at 4:01 am

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