Don’t Hit Me, I’m a Girl – Redux

I generally stay out of Facebook arguments. Getting involved in a Facebook argument is fail, plain and simple. Nobody’s mind is getting changed and about the best you can hope for is to not piss off your actual friends. However, it seems like abortion and birth control are the topics du jour lately – on the news, in the blogs, and even especially on Facebook.

Now, I generally don’t even notice this kind of thing. However, every now and then something sets me off. In this case, the Pink Mafia finally got to me. First there was the whole Komen affair, then the Obamneycare vs. the Catholic Church birth control flap, and then a whole series of “look, see how bad it is?” bills proposed to show us men exactly how terrible our stance on birth control and abortion is. Each of these cases has been followed by a violent wave of explosive stupidity vomit on Facebook.

I don’t mind people having different opinions. In fact, I like a good debate. Long time readers will have a good guess as to how I stand on these issues (against abortion, don’t care about birth control – but don’t want to be forced to pay for it, and against stupid bills). But I acknowledge that there are some decent arguments on the other side of these issues. There’s a secular case to be made for the pro-choice side (it’s weak, even when purely secular, and I think so-called Christians who are pro-choice are suffering from massive cognitive dissonance). There’s definitely a secular case for birth control (weaker than it’s generally made out to be, but not that bad). And… ok, there’s really no case at all for stupid bills or the stupid legislators who propose them.

I’m not talking about people who are genuinely arguing their side. I’m talking about the explosion of true stupidity that many are putting forth as arguments. It’s bad. Really bad. The total and complete lack of even a semblence of logic is truly stunning. I know, many in this corner of the blogosphere are going to ask me what I expect from a bunch of women. But really, even so… it’s this bad?

It finally got to me a few weeks ago, so I posted a link to one of the stupidly retarded bills and pointed out exactly how stupid and retarded it was. The surprising thing was how many friends I had who basically joined in and agreed. Thank God there’s some sanity left in the world. However, I had a couple of commenters who couldn’t let it go. One was my brother Wilson, arguing the pro-life side with all the skill of a dung beetle trying to use a wet noodle as a surfboard on the wake of a dying otter (that might even be a tad generous). The other is the new wife of a friend, arguing the pro-choice side with slightly more skill…

Until she wanted to deploy the, “Sorry if this is sexist, but men don’t even have a say in this,” card.

Friends, this is a classic Feminist move. It is not a valid argument – or at least (as you should point out to them) it’s no more valid than saying that she should get her ass back into the kitchen and shut up. It’s not really an argument at all. Rather, it’s a ploy intended to shut down argument. You don’t have any right to argue this. You aren’t capable of logic and reason. You don’t have any reason to try and protect your children or the children of society. You, in fact, are subhuman and should bow to her obvious superiority.

So I did the only correct thing – I shut it down and pointed it out for what it was.

Fast forward a little bit, and she’s posting a new argument on her own Facebook wall. I drop in and post a relatively innocuous comment (although it was, very definitely, in opposition to her position). OK, it was slightly snippy, but really and truly only a little bit.

A few hours later, I found myself de-friended and that comment had been deleted.

This, my friends, is a classic example of the “Don’t hit me, I’m a girl” ploy. As usually deployed by Feminists, first she picks a fight. Then, when she realizes she can’t win, she flees from the debate. In person, the appropriate response is to shut it down and call it for what it is. On Facebook? I’m leaning pretty hard toward ignoring it. I’m kind of tired of reading her rants anyway, and, of course, saying anything about it in a public forum just comes across as petulant. Her husband is a good friend of mine (good friend is putting it mildly; I was a groomsman in his wedding, and he would’ve been one in mine except that he couldn’t get leave from his deployment to Iraq), and he’s a bit of a hot head. But I’ve long since learned how to deal with his kind of temper tantrum – be the rock, and let the storm rage around you. It’s a technique that works equally well on women, children, and overly-emotional friends. Besides, once he calms down he’ll know (deep down) that I was right, even though he likely won’t admit it for fear that it’ll interrupt the pussy train.

But she’s not my wife, so as far as I’m concerned she can suck it. I’m going to get on with life.

Alpha Tip of the Day – Wear a Suit to Church

Today’s post is for all the young single men out there. Here’s some free advice. Get a really nice suit (plus all the matching gear: shoes, shirt, tie, etc), learn to wear it right, trim your hair, wash up, stand up straight and wear it to church on Sundays.

When I was a kid, probably 70-90% of the male congregation wore at least a shirt and tie to church, and a good portion of those wore full suits. Today when I go to church I count it a good day when I see 4 or 5 other men in suits. I picked up a really nice one from Jos A. Bank during one of their 50% off sales right before Easter and now I wear it every Sunday.

You’ll stand out like a sore thumb – but in the best possible way. If you learn to watch the signs, you can really see the way that the other women just look at you completely differently. This doesn’t really help me. I’m married already. But for all you single guys out there, it’s probably worth the money.

If I had my early 20s to do over again, this is one of the biggest changes I’d make.

Social Game: Status is More Important Than Wealth

Although he has his alpha qualities (without them, his marriage wouldn’t have survived more than forty years), my father is, at heart, the very kind of beta provider that Marriage 1.0 was designed to protect and reward. He’s very, very good at the provider role. He’s worked his ass off most of his life. Now, with retirement near at hand, he’s been playing the role of slacker pretty hard. But if anybody’s earned it, it’s him. He’s also more than a little bit Aspie. On top of that my mother and her family are the biggest verbal advocates of “forget what other people think and be yourself” that I’ve ever met. By “verbal advocates” I mean “hypocrites of the first order,” because although they say all of that, they don’t actually pay attention to any of it when judging other people (except for one aunt of mine and her husband – they actually live what they preach).

One result of that combination is that I was brought up with a very specific mindset regarding wealth and status symbols. In particular, I was raised very thoroughly to not “waste” money on status symbols such as nice clothes, nice cars, good haircuts, iPads, designer handbags, etc. Those things are silly and wasteful and they’ll only get in the way of your acquisition of real wealth.

Part of me is glad for that upbringing. There are an awful lot of things that people spend money on, solely for status symbols, that they really don’t need. Even more, Game tells us that status symbols are only partially effective at their desired goal (for men, attracting women; for women, status jockeying with other women). In order to really gain status in the eyes of men and women alike you need attitude, demeanor, poise and more. In short, you need skill.

But Game has also taught me something else. After your basic needs are met, status is more important than wealth. This holds true in almost every conceivable way. Higher status will help you with women more than higher wealth will. Higher status will help you get more promotions (and hence more wealth). Higher status will get you deference from your community in a way that higher wealth won’t. Higher status will help your children with their own reproductive quest far more than wealth will.

To be sure, that still doesn’t mean it’s smart to just blow all of your money on status symbols. For one thing, wealth itself helps you get status just as status helps you get more wealth. For another, not all status symbols are created equal. It’s very helpful, for instance, to be able to choose cost efficient status symbols to purchase.

But at this point in my life it’s abundantly clear to me that a big part of the reason I had so much trouble with women in my teens and early twenties is directly attributable to my refusal to play the status game. I did better than my brothers. I honestly chose not to play. They just sucked at it. My sister, on the other hand, is actually pretty good at it. She just hasn’t figured out that men don’t give a shit about her status and never will.

The interesting thing I’m finding as I start to play the game, however, is that I’m actually pretty good at it. And if you’re good at it, it’s actually kind of fun…

Don’t Bawl Like A Little Bitch

I recently saw my youngest brother. After the recent move we now live in the same town again, but we don’t see him very much. Intentionally.

I feel bad for my brother. He’s going to get royally screwed, and not in the good way. His wife is a quintessential Spoiled American Princess and he’s one of the most completely beta boys I know. I’d call him an Omega except he somehow managed to get married and knock her up. I’m pretty sure that the kid is his because if you take a picture of this baby and put it next to baby pictures of my grandfather, my father, myself, my two brothers and my son you’d swear up and down that we’re all siblings. My father’s family has strong genes. So, not Omega… but boy is his relationship headed for trouble.

I could write a whole blog about my brother, but today we’re going to focus on one small event. I saw him this time without the wife (whom I despise) or the kid (whom I feel bad for and kinda like) at a fairly sizable gathering and my wife and I overheard this snippet of conversation (paraphrased):

Brother: Yeah, ever since the baby was born I find myself a lot more sensitive to tear jerkers.
Friend: What now?
Brother: You know, tear jerkers. I bawl like a little baby at sad movies now.

On the way home, my wife brought it up again. My wife’s comment?

At least I’ve got a vagina. What’s his excuse?

This is but one of the many, many reasons his wife (and her entire family) don’t have any respect for him. I’ve said it before: don’t cry in front of her. It’s a bad idea.

Her other memorable comment of the night?

Now that I know about game, it’s even more annoying when guys act like that.

Game for Non-Sexual Purposes

As a side comment tangentially related to my last post, I’ve found that basic knowledge of Game principles has substantially improved my social interactions at all levels, including the dreaded family events previously described.

Adopt a good alpha posture and attitude when you’re dealing with a room full of women and everything changes. Avoid playing into their frame. Stop being afraid of their emotions. Tease them a bit. The fact that you’re well and truly not at all interested in sleeping with any of them only helps.